Across Oceans of Time... in a Galaxy Far, Far, Away

It has been 11 years. When I talk about discipline, I guess I am speaking to myself. 

So, I used to have this theory that the insanity that is happening in the US of A dates back to 1977. Why? And How? Well you see, as a kid, I remember all of my friends playing, we all wanted to be the hero, the Lone Ranger, or Superman, the good guy. Then, in May of 1977 all of that changed. George Lucas turned us all to the dark side. Suddenly no one gave a rats patoot about being the hero, everyone wanted to be Darth Vader. I mean everyone. No one even cared who Luke Skywalker was. 

I remember it explicitly. I lived in Bonn, Germany at the time. A New Hope wasn't actually released in Germany until February of 1978, so I had heard about Star Wars, but didn't get to see it until early '78. The following weekend on the playground at recess, everyone wanted to be Darth Vader. I remember it so vividly because we were all running around breathing into the cold air and feeling that being able to see our breath as it hit the cool air was proof that we were, in fact, Darth Vader. Massive arguments ensued about who was really Darth Vader. When Splinter of the Mind's Eye came out, every kid had to have a copy, well at least kids my age, because we hoped it would give us more insight into one of the coolest villains ever. Thank God that Return of the Jedi showed us that redemption is real.

Anyway, that should have at least given some insight into the idea that I am a huge, or maybe was, a huge Star Wars fan, here's more. When Phantom Menace was released, I went to the theater with one of my closest friends and my wife had to tag along. I remember the surge of adrenaline as the 20th Century Fox fanfare began to play. I looked over at Ramirez and we both high fived like little kids who had waited too, too long for Christmas morning. I am sure my wife was hanging her head in her hand, "what kind of absolute geek have I married." 

TANGENT! My wife is a bit younger, so Star Wars has always been around in her world. For us though, it was something new, something unheard of... I guess that may have an impact on nutty fandom? Who knows. 

Anyway, Ramirez and I were let down. We still love Star Wars, we both were totally excited about Darth Maul, and then supremely annoyed at how easily he was dispatched. Not to mention the annoying little kid and this garbage about midichlorians. I am pretty sure both of us have watched all of the recent releases, even though we now live over 1000 miles away from each other. Well, except Solo... I will not sully my eyes. With each film we are let down more and more. There has been one bright spot, Rogue One, phenomenal chapter and insanely good visual storytelling. Other than that, garbage. 

So, Mandalorian comes out. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!! I love Lone Wolf and Cub, I love Firefly, I see the framework of the series and storyline and am hooked before the first episode. Watched the first season. I fall on my knees and praise God. Star Wars is back! 

And then Season Two... what is it about Star Wars and it's destiny with traveling downhill after a great start. I guess theater and film mimic life. One moment you are on a peak, and then all of the rest of the moments are running down the hill, being stuck in the valley and trying to claw your way back to the next peak. This season of Mandalorian is following that trend. 

The last episode, Episode 4 from Season 2, "The Siege," is close to the bottom. I mean, I get I need to suspend some disbelief, but come on? Three people storm an Imperial Base, THREE PEOPLE!!! The Mandalorian, Cara Dune, and Greef Carga. They handily defeat a garrison of ground troops and three advanced combat fighters. I am not including Mythrol here because he was about as useless as two great big useless things. Only one of these three is, or was, a soldier. Yes, I get that Din Djarin comes from a warrior cast, but he's been a bounty hunter, same with Greef Carga. Remember, Dog, Duane Chapman, is also a bounty hunter. Not the kind of guy I would want for a frontal assault on a military base. 

Anyway, these three easily, almost comically, dispatch an entire garrison of Stormtroopers, without receiving so much as a single scratch!!! I mean one begins to wonder how the Empire was able to maintain its grip over the galaxy for so long if their soldiers are so inept. I certainly think that, in light of this, the opening of A New Hope changes drastically because the multiple rebel troops should have easily dispatched all of the invading stormtroopers, leaving Darth Vader to solve the problem, which might have been cool given the last scene in Rogue One. Speaking of Rogue One, a crack team of specialists makes a covert assault on an Imperial Base to steal the plans for the Death Star, and guess what, they all DIE!!! (say that like Sam Kinison).

Back to the focus of the rant. As they escape, they steal an assault vehicle, which Mythrol says is worth money early on but Cara likens it to a moving toad. This assault tank is able to out run not one, not two, but three, TIE Fighters. You know, there's a reason why ground troops fear the A-10 Warthog, or the Apache helicopter, because they cannot out maneuver an aircraft. The A-10 and Apache are not fast moving, super aerodynamic aircraft. And don't make the argument that a TIE fighter is an Air to Air combat vehicle, because ground pounder munitions can be added to an F-22, FA-18, F-16, F-4 and so on. They are sill able to out maneuver an assault vehicle and wax it... this is why we have SAMs, to protect ground vehicles from air assault. 

Let us return to space. So, two of the TIE fighters are able to damage the cannon on the assault vehicle and it looks like all is lost. Suddenly, Din appears in his tricked out flying trash dumpster and out flies and out maneuvers the two TIE fighters and wastes them. WHAT TOTAL GARBAGE. Even with the repairs, and I might add the repair shop is a dude with some tools on the open desert, the narrative has pushed us in the direction of understanding that Din's ship is old, outdated, and altogether iffy. This is like pitting an old DC-3 against an F-22. And you cannot argue that Din has tricked out his ship, it's still a cargo vessel for transporting stuff. 

In World War II they put weapons on DC-3's, and they were still sitting ducks for lighter and more maneuverable aircraft. That's why they often had fighter escorts. Now, put that WWII DC-3 with tricked out stuff against an F-22, or even a Vietnam Era F-4. No chance in hell for the DC-3. 

 Look, I am not rooting for Din to lose, or even his allies to die or get hurt, although that would make things a bit more real. Just don't ask me to believe in absolute horse dookie. I think Favreau hit the nail on the head with this concept. Let's keep it real, make the journey more of a crucible. It will make Din's victories taste so much sweeter. Come on guys.